The Battle of the Wide-Tooth Comb: A Black Girl’s Rite of Passage 🫠💆🏾‍♀️🔥

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If you know, you KNOW. 😩

There are certain universal Black girl experiences that shape you, mold you, and prepare you for life’s toughest battles—and getting your hair done as a child is at the TOP of that list. 🥴

It starts the same way every time:
Your mama, auntie, or grandma (whichever hairstyling authority is in charge that day) calls you over. You already know what time it is. Your stomach drops. Your soul leaves your body for a moment. 😵‍💫💀

The comb appears. Not just any comb. That big ol’ wide-tooth comb that somehow still manages to snatch your soul despite being designed for "gentle" detangling. 😭 The Blue Magic grease makes its grand entrance, shining in the jar like the final boss of a video game. ✨🫠

You sit down, try to brace yourself, but it doesn’t matter. You’re about to feel every bad decision you’ve made this week. 😭

The first pass through your hair sends a signal straight to your ancestors. 😭 Your head jerks, you let out a deep “Maaaaaamaaaa!!” but she is UNMOVED. 🫢 She grips your scalp tighter and mutters the classic line:

“Stop movin’ before I REALLY give you something to cry about.” 🫠👀

Now, at this point, you have two choices:

  1. Stay still and suffer in silence like the strong Black queen in training that you are. 👑
  2. Dodge, dip, and weave like your life depends on it (which it might). 🏃🏾‍♀️💨

Spoiler alert: Both choices end in pain. 😭

And let’s not forget the "hot comb on the stove" era. WHEW. 🥵🔥 That was a different level of fear. That sizzling sound? A death sentence. 😨 If you heard that comb hit the back of your ear, you knew your soul had left your body and gone straight to the ancestors for comfort. ☠️👼🏾

And yet… we survived. 😌

We walked out of those hair sessions with slick ponytails, neat braids, and scalp SHININ’ from all that grease. 💁🏾‍♀️✨ We looked GOOD, baby. Battle scars and all. 💪🏾

So, to every Black woman who’s ever fought the good fight against a comb, a brush, or a hot comb—I salute you. 🫡 We earned our crowns the hard way. And we wear them proudly. 👑🖤💆🏾‍♀️🔥😭


 

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